NNtG: Ghosts of Fear Street #03: The Attack of the Aqua Apes

Time to monkey around with another visit to kid-friendly Shadyside. Okay, so if you dared to read these chronologically, the next sentence may be confusing, but it's interesting that we're really getting down to the nitty gritty. And yet in the midst of getting through so much of the series, I always keep forgetting about this one. Not that the concept of aqua apes isn't a neat one, just gets lost in the shuffle with living bug men and monster dogs. So let's see if this was worth the wait, or if it's just a monkey in the middle? It's The Attack of the Aqua Apes.

This cover is so silly that it by proxy is one of the best covers in t he series. The aqua ape in question looks both creepy and goofy with its expression and how it eyes the goldfish, who is also given a comedically goofy expression. I've never seen a fish realize it's screwed before but there's a first time for everything. Great uses of color as well, especially on the lightning effect under the ape face. Another high marks Steadman work.

Scott Adams (no, not the Dilbert guy) and his friend Glen Brody are looking at ads in the back of comic books when Scott notices one for aqua apes. You know, sea monkeys, brine shrimp. I never got conned into buying them, but Scott really wants to be conned. Because if something wild were to happen, he'd have something to talk about at school, since everyone else in Shadyside has a scary story to tell. The ad promises that the magic crystals you buy, when put in water, will create living underwater monkeys. But Glen is the first to dismiss all of this as mere bunk. But he ultimately gives in and pays the postage and handling portion of the order. He still thinks it won't work, but if they do, he'll be a monkey's uncle. If that's the twist... well, there's been worse ones.

Three weeks pass and Scott finally gets his monkeys. Only instead of what the ad showed, it's indeed the brine shrimp variety. Tiny little fish creatures that don't look at all like apes. As Scott and Glen prepare the tiny tank included in the box, Scott gets the idea to use water from Fear Street Woods. Maybe something interesting will happen with that water. They fill the tank and put the "magic crystals" in the water and shake the tank as instructed. Suddenly, Scott feels a strange electrical surge go through his body. But sure enough, the aqua apes are alive. Not exactly attacking yet, but they sure exist. There's also a strange fizzing black crystal in the water, but the kids decide to ignore it for now. No way that's going to be a concern, I'm certain.

That night however, the tank continues to flash on and off as bubbles fizz heavily from the black crystal. Scott goes to investigate, but sees large bolts of lightning shoot from the tank. The lid of the tank shoots off and as Scott looks for it, he sees that the black crystal has vanished. The next day, the apes have gotten bigger, including one rather big aqua ape that bangs on the tank. Scott's finally impressed as he's finally gotten his apes. He shows Glen the tank later that day and as they spot one of the smaller apes swimming, a giant hairy arm from a crater at the bottom of the tank grabs it and crushes it with ease. Just because Stine didn't write this, what made you think were were going to avoid animal cruelty? Even fictional aqua ape cruelty? In fact, the aqua ape emerges from the crater and eats all of the remaining brine shrimp apes. I can't believe it. All his apes gone.

The boys name the aqua ape Mac and try to show Scott's older sister Kelly, who doesn't see anything. After she leaves, the boys see the crater in the tank is broke in half and Mac is now mouse-sized. Later, Scott and Glen see all the aquarium toys thrown out of the tank and a bunch of stuff like a watch, a coin and a rubber ball now inside with the gerbil-sized Mac. So the aqua ape can escape the bowl and has a taste for redecorating! Reader beware, indeed. Both boys also think that maybe the lake water is what did this. Scott puts his hand in the water, but Mac bites him with his razor teeth, then climbs up Scott's sleeve and onto his back. After they remove Mac from Scott's back, they play ball with the ape before it starts to shrink back down and heads back into the water, which confirms that it can only grow in the water and loses power the longer it's out of it. They then leave for the arcade without putting a lid on the tank because we're only halfway through and we need an excuse for these kids to be stupid.

But wouldn't you know it? Mac comes with them to the arcade and starts going inside coin slots and shooting out quarters. After a bit of a chase with the aqua ape and dealing with the arcade owner kicking them out, Scott and Glen notice that Mac is weak and tiny again. So back into the tank he goes, only now Mac grows to the size of a rabbit. We're getting very close to "where do you put a 500 pound gorilla? Wherever it wants" territory. Also Mac has wings, so we get a lot of flying monkeys and Wizard of Oz references. Last time that happened the book ended with a kid being a dog all along. Please, I beg you, not that again. That night Scott heads to Fear Woods again and continues to be almost pushed to the lake by an invisible force. And sure enough, a giant Mac emerges from the lake and grabs him. And none of that actually happened because that was just a dream. That was just a dream. That's me in the corner...

Scott wakes up to see that Mac escaped the bowl, tied Kelly's hair up so badly that it needs to be cut, and is still running loose in the house. Scott also doesn't tell his parents about the little ape running around the house so no "because Goosebumps parents" moment. I'm liking this book. Please don't blow it at the ending. The rest of Scott's family leave as Glen shows up. Also it's raining which I'm sure won't be a massive concern very soon. Mac runs amok in the house, tearing up all of the food in the kitchen, destroying a dress for Kelly, ruining the car. So even if he did blame this on a water ape, he's still going to be killed. Speaking of killed, that appears to happen to Mac as they end up accidentally crushing Mac with the garage door. Just as the rain falls, which upgrades Mac's condition to alive. The now giant ape breaks through the house and creates more mischief and Scott's mom comes home just in time for the "because Goosebumps parents" moment. Oh, and there's your demerit. What a pity.

After Scott's mom leaves again, the boys hear Mac in the bathroom and decide that the best thing to do is to flush him down the toi-these kids are frigging stupid-let. And sure enough, Mac now ends up in the pipes. Mac breaks through the toilet then continues to attack before the boys manage to smack Mac with a frying pan, knocking it out. They then take the shrinking aqua ape and put it in a cookie jar and hide it in the closet. Three days pass and they check inside the jar, seeing that Mac is now back to crystal form. The nightmare is finally over.

That is until a while later when Scott's mom puts the cookie jar in the dishwasher. Scott then sees Mac's arm pressing at the window of the dishwasher door.

It's the duo of Anna and Gina Cascone (A.G. Cascone) who penned this book. That would definitely explain a few things about it. First in that it's a solid book with a heavier focus on action throughout, along with a heavier focus on snappy dialogue as Glen and Scott often argue with one another. So like the later book Eye of the Fortune Teller, this makes two for two in terms of solid books. Though I like Fortune Teller more as I feel that book used its length far better whereas this book feels like it starts to stretch itself thin by the end. Better twist at least, I can give this book that much. I do like the concept of this book more than Fortune Teller, mainly in less stereotypes to tiptoe around, but also in the concept of having to deal with this otherworldly creature as it causes chaos. Shame we never got why this happened though? Was it really the lake water or was it always the case? Are there more "Mac" incidents with these brine shrimp? I guess it'd be tricky to get those answers given the only source the kids have is an ad from a comic book. 

Scott and Glen are okay protagonists. Though Glen kind of goes from the more logical of the two to playing just as much idiot ball as Scott does. Kelly mostly exists, really just being there for some bad things to happen to her by Mac that gets Scott in trouble. Mac is also a neat monster concept. This weird sponge monkey creature with wings that can grow in water, shrink when dried and loves to cause mischief. Constantly at the expense of Scott and Glen. Though in fairness, given how lax the boys were with handling this dangerous creature, any ordeal they deal with is entirely on them, so T.S. 

Overall, not really much to complain about with this one. It's another solid Ghosts book that, while a bit too crazed in its latter half, still works as a solid read that's definitely worth a recommend. There are far better books within the Ghosts of Fear Street library, but this is a book you shouldn't monkey around with. The Attack of the Aqua Apes gets an A-.