It's time for a fresh Give Yourself Goosebumps hot off the rack. I mean this book's been around since 1997 but you get my point. We're talking comic books again, which Stine is sometimes really good with, sometimes a bit all over the place with. Which given this is a book with multiple paths, being all over the place might actually be beneficial. So is this a super hero or a super zero? Let's find out as we enter the Little Comic Shop of Horrors.
As is the case with these books, given that the protagonist is often presented as the reader and no specific gender is given, I'll be using They/Them and "The Player" when I talk about our protagonist. Cool? See you in the funny papers.
The protagonist finds themselves in the comic club after school. Which sounds cool, talking about comic books and stuff, but unfortunately this is a 90s comic club which means speculator market, baby! The head of the club, Horace Grumbacher, bores the player with slideshows of famous comics and their astronomical prices. The player leaves, but their bus has already left, so they have to walk home. Taking a shortcut, they notice that things look really weird all of a sudden. They spot a comic shop with a rather angry looking guy behind the counter. The player then notices the comics are on for half-price and the comics look like the super pricy ones that Horace was talking about, pricy comics called Super Doer and Ballistic Bug. But the player also notices a path downstairs, but a sign says that anyone that goes downstairs will be glompfed, whatever that means. There's also a warning to not touch the comics on the rack or there will be consequences. So, do we take the rack or go downstairs?
PATH #1: COMIC RELIEF
The player touches the Super Doer comic on the rack, but notices their hand is stuck. Worse, the rack is spinning on its own. The player is lifted in the air and finds themselves being pulled inside a comic book. The player finds themselves in a flat place with a large crowd that's not moving. Which is concerning given the giant robot stomping in their direction. The player runs into a kid they know from School named Wally. Wally ended up trapped in the comic world the same way the player did. However, escaping the comic world seems difficult as Wally notes another kid named Alex tried, but wound up being smeared. Speaking of being smeared, the player notes that if they don't get out, they're about to be stepped on by the giant robot. Wally notes that the way to escape one comic to another is to say the words "Guest Shot" which causes him to vanish. The player utters the words and disappears, but to where, Super Doer or Ballistic Bug? There is what's considered a good ending with both paths. So we'll start with Super Doer.
The player enters the world of Super Doer and ends up being hit in the head with a brick. However, it doesn't hurt the player as they ARE Super Doer. They test this out by getting a steel bar and bending it. This causes some workmen to be mad about their steel beams being used for some superhero's workout session. Suddenly a giant dinosaur attacks a building and the player flies to confront them, only to discover that Wally has become the dinosaur. Talk or fight are the paths to take, and the choice is to fight. Wally climbs the building and grabs a steel beam, which he uses to smash the player like a baseball. The player recovers and uses their cosmic vision to see where they're going, which is right into a building. Veer or try to pass through? It's pass through. People's homes be damned.
After beating up on Wally some more, the player is told by Wally that he was turned into this monster by mad scientist Tex Loudsnore. NOT LEX LUTHOR, do not sue Mr. R.L. Stine there D.C. Comics. So the player arrives at Loudsnore's skull-shaped lair, but gets caught with a metal door in their way. Choices are heat vision or another power of the player's, super strong breath. It's the breath we're after. It breaks down the door. After breaking another door, the player is met with Tex Loudsnore who is recognizable by his bald head THIS IS PARODY PLEASE DO NOT SUE ROBERT LAWRENCE STINE DC. He throws a test tube at the player and it's time for our favorite way to choose a path: Convoluted nonsense. Grab a ruler, squeeze the bottom of the ruler from the one-inch mark, then let go. If you catch the ruler between the one to nine-inch mark, take one path, if you catch it at the nine to twelve mark, take another. I'll admit, it's a more inspired take then "are you wearing a sweater?" For the good ending, you need the 9-12 catch.
The player misses the catch of the test tube and it smashes, but the gas inside strips the player of their super powers. The player pleads with Loudsnore that they're not the real Super Doer, they came from a world outside the comics. Loudsnore decides to help the player get home. And to do so requires either entering what looks like a giant coffin, or something called the hazzafrazza device. The choice we make is the coffin. The coffin checks out, but Loudsnore says that the only way to send the player home is to let every atom of their body be destroyed, which means no more Super Doer in the process. Go with it, or try to escape? The call is to go with it. It works and sure enough the player finds themselves back at what they thought was the comic shop, but actually a vacuum shop. The comic shop closed down ages ago. So I guess the player was in a weird time loop that caused all this? Either way, all is well and that's a happy end.
That's the world of Super Doer, what of Ballistic Bug? The player enters the world of Ballistic Bug, but as a burglar, so they shout Guest Shot again and now are Peewee Parkbench, the secret identity of Ballistic Bug THIS IS A PARODY I BESEECH THEE MARVEL COMICS DO NOT SUE JOVIAL BOB STINE. They're in the origin comic, at the power plant with the radioactive bug bites Peewee and gives him the bug powers. So do you let it happen or try to hop to another comic? Instead of being bitten, it's off to yet another Ballistic Bug comic. This time the player is full-powered Ballistic Bug facing Dr. Doof. Which is supposed to be a Dr. Doom parody, but I just imagine this kid's fighting with a guy who looks like a pharmacist who really wants to control the tri-state area. The player uses their bug wings to avoid Dr. Doof, but have to use their Insecto-Electro-Hornet-Sting. But does the player do it from far away or up close? The choice is up close, but it doesn't do much as Dr. Doof grabs the player by the throat.
Dr. Doof is mad that the player went off-script. It was supposed to be the Super-Sonic-Buzz-a-ronic power instead. So, yeah. This whole fight is choreographed because it's a comic book world. So either continue the fake fight or take a break? The option is taking a break. Dr. Doof yells up to someone, to which the player realizes it must be the person making the comic. So it's either try to get Doof to help, or try to find the person in charge. The choice is sticking with Doof. Doof suggests creating a hole in space with their weapons, which works. But Doof jumps into the hole first. Follow, or look before you leap? The choice is to follow. The player follows the hole and finds themselves back at the front of their school as their bus is ready to take them home. They also find a picture of Dr. Doof, lost in space.
So that was some really wacky comic adventures, but what if we went downstairs? What the hell is getting glompfed?
PATH #2: GLOMPFED
Turns out Glompf is the noise of the stairs turning into a slide as the player tumbles down into a strange corridor. They wander until they find copies of the comic The Cellar of Scary Stories, which is hosted by Milo the Mutant. So we're going Cryptkeeper with this one. The player hears sounds of someone following them. Discover or flee? Discovering gives us a path with two unique good endings (plus one ambiguous), and fleeing also leads to a good ending. So we'll start with the running path before discovery. The player makes a run for it. The player runs, but not before cutting themselves on the jagged plywood walls. This attracts the monster, which is a mix of a bull, a bird and a lion. They then hear a kid calling from above to grab his hand. And to make it, it's time for yet another case of interactive nonsense. This time, it's involving the time. If the hour is an odd number go one way, even the other. Hope you read this at like, three o'clock, otherwise...
The player is saved by a boy named Bob, who has been living in the mazes under the comic shop with some others. He shoots at the monster with a slingshot and leads the player around the maze. They then run into another monster with a snake body and hair of snakes. Not a Medusa oddly enough, but still one that can wrap up the player and kill them. Bob then tells the player to not follow him as he needs to speak with the leader of their group, Russell, to see if the player is worthy. So follow Bob or stay? The player follows Bob, but instead finds a trapdoor which causes them to fall into icy water. The player wakes up in Antarctica as scientists have unthawed the player, who has no idea how they got there. But the player does go home, now rich and famous for surviving hypothermia, so the player heads to the comic store. And that's technically a good ending, so yeah.
But what if we ran? The player discovers that it's not Milo the Mutant following them, but Frankenstein's monster? Or just Frankenstein because I guess Stine never considered that the monster isn't Frankenstein. The player tries to avoid Frankenstein, but has a hard time doing so, so the next options are to sneak past or run for it. Sneaking is our call here. The player sneaks away from Frankenstein and runs into two kids. Cammie and Jack. They've been trapped in Milo's maze for a long time. Turns out that Milo is real, but because his comic got cancelled, he blames kids for it and traps them inside. I mean, the comics code sort of was more the reason, but... So now the player has to choose to follow Jack and Cammie or leave them. Obviously we have to follow them. They run into a mummy and get attacked by a Werewolf. The kids mention that the maze is filled with classic horror monsters. Suddenly Milo shows up. The choices are to tackle him or try to escape. Either way leads to different good ending paths. Starting with Tackle then escape.
Milo mentions that he has a reason for keeping the kids trapped down in the maze, but he's tackled by the three before he can explain. So do you choose having him send the kids back, or explain what he meant. Milo explains that this is all to get him a new show on a TV network. So he kidnapped kids to scare them with his monsters, which seems like a PR nightmare even in the 90s. The player notes that his monsters are sort of lame, so he asks the player what a good monster would be. To which the player chooses King Jellyjam from The Horror at Camp Jellyjam. Yep, this is our Goosebumps reference of the book. Milo transforms into King Jellyjam, which scares the player. They either have to admit, or try to face the snail-sweating blobby mass. By admitting that the form is scary, Milo makes the player their partner as the show becomes a huge hit, even landing a snail farm sponsorship. If the player fights Jellyjam-Milo, they have to choose between poking him in the eyes or suffocating him. Of course, if you read the book, the call is to just let Jellyjam sweat so much that it dies from its own stench. The player escapes, triumphant, but stinky.
What if we tried escaping Milo? Well call Kenny Loggins because the kids run and find themselves in the Danger Zone. The player touches a wall but ends up in a different room. They wander and find a room filled with a puddle of goopy ink-like liquid. Go through it, or find another way? Turns out it's going through it. The player trudges through and the kids reunite, only now something is following the player's slimy sneakerprints. So the player throws away their sneakers and looks for another way around. Cammie finds what appears to be a magic mirror that could send the kids home, maybe not. Leave Cammie to test it or push ahead. Pushing ahead just takes you to a bad ending you could have gotten another way, so mirror it is. However, Milo's face pops up in the mirror, so no good with that. They head into another room and find a trapdoor in the ceiling. They try a ladder, but it disappears. So instead, they use a bunch of old comic boxes to climb up. The player escapes and calls the cops, but when they arrive, there's no sign of anyone, except for the missing kids. Before leaving, the player finds the rare copy of Super Doer and sells it to buy a mansion. So mega happy ending.
There are 24 bad endings. What befell the player in this tale of comic book mayhem and maze madness? It's a bird! It's a plane! It's... the bad endings.
#01: Wally overuses the Guest Shot power and begins to melt. However, so does the player.
RATING: 2.5. Solid enough screw-over of both the player and Wally. Nothing like a good old "nobody wins" ending.
#02: The player flies upward to avoid hitting the building. However, they fly into space and crash into the moon.
RATING: 3. A good use of tricking the player into what they would think is the right call to make. Let this be a lesson. Stine loves him some property damage.
#03: The player uses magma vision, however it causes the entire comic page to catch fire. The player chokes on the smoke and presumably burns to death.
RATING: 4. You could argue there's a logic hole here. That if you're a comic book character in a comic world, why would everything react like it's paper, thereby making the powers useless? But I'll look past it for a pretty dark ending.
RATING: 3. Another really good subversion path. Though I guess if you were going to trust a supervillain to blast you with a weapon, you're kind of an idiot to begin with.
#05: The player tries to escape from being atomized, but is too late. They get destroyed but Super Doer remains.
RATING: 2.5. I mean one of the two outcomes had to see the player get wiped out like that. You don't set up "disintegration" without some payoff.
#06: The player is bitten by the radioactive bug. Suddenly they can't feel their hands or feet and collapse in a heap. Turns out they're allergic to radioactive bugs and just dies.
RATING: 4.5. This book's been full of some really good screw-overs, and this might be the best one. It's super dark. It's also kind of an idea that Marvel would do with Spider-Man, only have it be more a radioactive poisoning than allergic death.
#07: The player tries to plead with Dr. Doof, but gets strangled to death instead.
RATING: 2.5. I mean, he's a villain. He doesn't seem to keen on listening to reason. Also this book's just on a roll with kid killing.
#08: The player continues the fight with Dr. Doof who uses the old A-233, which flings the player at high speed into the wall where they break their neck.
RATING: 3. And just as I mention kid killing here's another really good dark end. Stine was cooking with this one.
#09: The player tries to fly up to find whoever is in charge of the comic, but passes out and falls to the ground below. The player is now the Powerful Pancake.
RATING: 2.5. Another really good screw-over. How long until this streak ends?
#10: Doof escapes to the real world with intent to conquer it. The player tries to stop him, but gets bisected inside the dimensional hole.
RATING: 2. Decent way to end the story so close to the end, but also probably the most forgettable after so many bangers.
#11: The player tricks Wolfen-Bean to use the "Guest Shot" turning him to an inkblot. The other Y's guys are angry and presumably kill the reader.
RATING: 2.5. Another good bad ending. Also, yeah, there's another path with an X-men parody called the Y's guys, but their path leads to bad endings. Kinda wish we had a chance to have fun with that one.
#12: Professor Y kills the player with his extending hair.
RATING: 2. Creepy, but not as dark as some of the ones we've gotten. Also yes, the Professor X parody isn't bald in this one. Good subversion, Bob.
#13: The player escapes from the comic, but retains the size of their image on the paper. The comic owner mistakes them for a bug and squishes them with his fist.
RATING: 3.5. No, seriously. Stine actually TRIED with these?
#14: As Super Doer, the player is exposed to Ziptonite which presumably kills them.
RATING: 1.5. I mean one of them had to do the Kryptonite bit.
#15: The player, now a giant lizard creature, is attacked by Wally, who is now the superhero Gnatman.
RATING: 1.5. Neat, but just sort of ends.
#16: The player tries to help a boy named Charlie, trapped under some wreckage, but is unable to lift the wreckage. However, the monster catches the player and presumably kills them.
RATING: 3. That's what you get for reading the book at an even hour I guess.
#17: The player is caught by the snake monster who teases letting them grow before eating, but was just joking.
RATING: 3. This is the result of another gimmick. If you bend one leg and can't grab your foot, you're doomed.
#18: The player asks the bug creatures for help, but the bugs are afraid of the player, so the player is trapped forever.
RATING: 1. Decent, but we've gotten a lot of darker ones that this feels the weakest.
#19: The player runs for it, only to get caught by Frankenstein who tries to unscrew their head off.
RATING: 3. This might be the most death-heavy GYG I've read and so many of them have been great.
#20: Trying to get Milo to send the player home fails as Milo transforms into The Glob and absorbs the player.
RATING: 2.5. Another really good dark ending.
#21: The player jabs Jellyjam-Milo in the eyes. Angered, he eats the player.
RATING: 2. I like the use of Jellyjam, but this does feel like a very basic way to finish him off.
#22: The player tries to avoid the inky goo, but a giant monster pops out and drags them down.
RATING: 2.5. Of course the liquid has a monster inside.
#23: Small insects bite and sting the kids until they die
RATING: 2.5. Good and creepy way to die with that one.
#24: Jack and Cammie turn into cannibal monsters and eat the player alive.
RATING: 5. In a book with a lot of super wild deaths, the winner for freakiest is easily this one. It also makes sense given how long Jack and Cammie have been down there that they've lost their sanity and found a love of human flesh. Good stuff.
BEST ALTERNATE ENDING: YES I CANNIBAL
WORST ALTERNATE ENDING: GNAT VERY GOOD
This might be early to say, but I think this might be my favorite Give Yourself Goosebumps book I've read for the blog so far. If this changes with a book before this one, then blame chronological order for that. But yeah, both paths offer something really fun and unique, while never really losing the comic book gimmick of the book. And it's one with a lot of really good deaths. Some I argue might be the darkest ones we've gotten in the series so far. I've harped on the last couple I've done as not having the same level of dark oomph I was hoping for with this series, then I go into this one and it's kid death after kid death after kid death. Each feeling super unique and being good subversions of what the player thought their decision would end up as. The in-comic book path is probably my favorite of the two. Stine gets to have fun with superheroes and gimmicks, being able to even land some decent meta humor with the whole "it's all staged by a creator" thing. And for clear-cut parodies of Spider-Man, Superman and even the X-Men, you can tell that Stine definitely is a comic reader who gets what makes these comics work. And the bad endings help accentuate that. Great stuff all around.
The Milo the Mutant path is really good, but I'd say it feels unfinished. Like the good endings you get from them feel like they're missing a beat or two to really feel as good. But hey, a reference to King Jellyjam was something I didn't expect and I feel it worked great. Surprising it was Jellyjam and not the Masked Mutant, but I guess that would be a bit too obvious. So you can tell that Stine had an idea for what he wanted out of this book and gave us some fun paths and dark endings. And this might be the best example of Goosebumps succeeding in both horror and comedy and the dark humor lands and there's some really good uses of horror to be found. So this is an easy recommend book for me. A great use of the Give Yourself Goosebumps gimmick and is just a fun book from start to finish. I hope that trend continues. Though knowing Stine, I can already feel imminent disappointment. Little Comic Shop of Horrors gets an A-.
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