Thursday, May 27, 2021

The Stinal Countdown: Goosebumps SlappyWorld #12: My Friend Slappy


Well, we've finally made it. The last Slappy book currently released until 2022. Finally we can take a break from him. At least for now. And what better way to toast our old pal then to give him one more roasting? It's time to meet My Friend Slappy.


This cover is just okay. Definitely my least favorite of the SlappyWorld Slappy covers, but it still works fine. I like the mixture of silly and sinister that the cover conveys. We of course have Slappy, creepy as ever, but now he has this "Best Friends 4 Ever" t-shirt over his suit. I don't think it fully sells the concept of Slappy being anyone's friend as much as it does just putting Slappy in a humiliating moment, which feels pretty rare even for Goosebumps. 

Barton Suggs has a bit of a rough life. He doesn't have any friends aside from Lizzie Hellman, and he has a pair of bullies named Travis Fox and Kelly Washington who love to make his life hell. Not even the fact that he and his class are on a field trip to the DaffyTaffy factory helps his mood, even considering that it's run by his dad. Barton also has an interest in puppets, so you know, setting things up for later. He also dreams of one day getting back at Travis and Kelly for their constant bullying. We meet Mr. Suggs, who is excited to show the factory, but also talks to Barton, hoping maybe he'll finally stand up to them. 

So, Barton grabs Kelly and throws him into the taffy puller. No, that didn't actually happen, but you know, this kid's got some dark fantasies. As the class observes the chocolate vat from a catwalk above, Barton gets bumped, knocking him over the rail and eventually right into the vat. Kelly and Travis claim they didn't do anything, but now Barton is covered in chocolate and the vat now has to be cleaned, not to mention Barton's allergic to chocolate so it affects his skin, so day didn't go too well. Cut to Saturday when Barton's father brings him something to help with his confidence issues. A ventriloquist dummy. THAT ventriloquist dummy.


Lizzie arrives later, after being chased by Kraken, the dog belonging to the Grimm family. Sounds like a cheerful bunch. Lizzie loves dogs, despite being allergic to them. Oh god, don't remind me of that Bone Chillers book. They talk about the whole "falling into the vat" thing. Barton knows for sure that it was Travis and Kelly who pushed him in, and he really wants to find a way to get them back. After Lizzie leaves, Barton finds the paper with the magic words. He almost reads them out loud, but opts to just play with his other marionettes. 

Suddenly, Travis and Kelly enter his room and tell Barton that they didn't push him. They also promise to be nicer to him, even taking him to a concert for some band called Crokodile Tears, which is an odd name, but okay. All Barton has to do is their book reports. Barton says he won't and the bullies promise that he'll regret it, while also kicking Slappy in the gut. After some time, Barton heads to Lizzie, only to see Travis and Kelly release the Kraken. Hey, when else was I going to say it? The dog tackles Barton and attacks him until Mr. Grimm saves him. Great, now I want to play Twisted Metal, thanks Stine!

Frustrated that Travis and Kelly are ruining him, he decides to write those book reports after all. Okay then. Like, they're already making your life a living hell and you're just gonna simp for them? And sure enough, it was all for nothing. They never had a ticket for him, this was all to mess with him. Frustrated, Barton attacks them, only to be caught by Mr. Plame, their teacher. Travis and Kelly feign innocence and Barton gets punished for them. You know, I should feel bad, but dude, you brought this all on yourself.


Now suspended, Barton is stuck at home for he actions. Lizzie shows up and talks with him for a while before seeing the piece of paper in Slappy's pocket which she reads aloud. So, 60 pages in we finally get to Slappy coming to life. After the last two, this felt like an eternity. And after a few books where we got some fun variation on this, it's back to the standard Slappy hurling insults, angering someone, and Barton getting in trouble for it. In this case, ruining his friendship with Lizzie.

So, Slappy is indeed alive. Barton goes to put him away, but Slappy uses these powers he has in this series to give him a powerful shock. But Barton isn't afraid of Slappy, he's elated. Not only does he have a living dummy, but that dummy has powers, so now he can get some revenge. Slappy is confused about what's going on, peeved that even his "slave servant" talk isn't even working. In fact, Barton wants to be Slappy's friend. So, Slappy agrees to be Barton's friend, which we know is already a plan to screw him over at some point in the story, but let's keep moving, shall we?

Some time later, Barton invites Lizzie back and shows her the walking, talking Slappy. And given that Slappy and Barton are indeed chummy with one another, it scares Lizzie enough to send her running out of the house. Then Slappy uses his powers to keep Barton frozen in place and use the other puppets in his room to attack him. Barton is actually scared of Slappy now, but given he needs to stay on the dummy's good side for his plan, he says that he still wants to be Slappy's best friend. He calls Lizzie later and tells her his plan. He's going to bring Slappy to school where Travis and Kelly will steal him. Slappy will then come to life and frighten them, ensuring that they never bother Barton again. Lizzie asks how he'll get rid of Slappy after, but Barton's sure that this is totally not a stupid thing he's embarking on.


Barton returns to school and shows off his puppet collection, including Slappy. Mr. Plame grabs Slappy and insults him, so Barton worries the dummy will retaliate with insults of his own. He surprisingly doesn't. But he does bite the teacher's finger regardless. Later, Travis once again bothers Barton, and Slappy gets up and begins to talk. He then uses his powers to make Travis fly in the air and spin faster and faster. Barton tries to get Slappy to stop, but the dummy continues. He sends Travis crashing into a tree, unable to get back down. Barton is furious, but Slappy says that it was justified for picking on his pal. And he has something else planned for Kelly.

That night, a cop named Officer Marcus arrives at the Suggs residence with Travis. He wants the actual account of what happened and not Travis' story of a dummy throwing him into a tree. Barton feigns innocence and Slappy complies, not before biting Travis when he gets a chance. With everyone gone, Slappy once again says he has something fun in store for Kelly. We learn that Kelly was Barton's friend until Travis arrived and that all changed. But despite that, Barton still wants revenge. He just hopes Slappy will behave himself and, you know, not commit attempted murder.

The pair arrive at Kelly's house. Kelly is worried that there'll be a mess since his mother is holding a book club meeting. Mrs. Washington arrives, just as Slappy uses his powers to make Kelly dance uncontrollably, thrashing about and making a mess. The two leave, pleased with the mess they made, though Barton does feel bad for Kelly. But at least he's done with all of this revenge stuff. But Slappy isn't. In fact, he's decided his next victim will be Lizzie. They arrive at Lizzie's house and Slappy tells her that only he can be Barton's friend. He then takes her giant collection of stuffed dogs and uses his powers to tear them apart, burying the kids in a sea of stuffing. Barton manages to get the paper in time and read the words, which once again put Slappy to sleep. Barton decides he'll throw Slappy in the dump and be done with his former friend.

Time passes and Barton's life's a bit better. Travis and Kelly have essentially become Biff Tannen and are his friends now. As he walks home with Lizzie, suddenly Kraken the dog runs at them. And then asks Barton to be his friend. Wait, what?

My Friend Slappy is definitely one of the more conservative dummy books in a while. Going somewhat less for the insanity of some other SlappyWorld Slappy tales for something slightly closer to the formula, while feeling just different enough. Barton's an okay protagonist. You do feel bad for his plight given Travis and Kelly continue to harass him, but given how stupid he is to try and help them, you don't feel that bad. And when we get to his stuff with Slappy, it's not that bad. Forming a slight bond with Slappy that is ultimately still motivated on revenge. And while he gets it, things still go out of control. See, that's how Revenge R Us should have been.

Again, no answer as to how Slappy has these sudden powers, but they're back to just telekinesis. He isn't pulling out heat vision or anything. I do wish they built on the friendship thing a bit more. Whether Slappy actually wanted to be Barton's friend or not doesn't get that much time to flesh out, so we don't know if he genuinely wanted Lizzie out of the picture, or it was just another case of his regular brand of malice. Does give a few fun moments and an okay climax. No clue what the hell that twist was about though. I don't think Stine had any other ideas other than "screw it, add a talking dog." At least it isn't just another Slappy win for the third book in a row, I guess?

I feel the book could have had more fun with the premise of Slappy having a friend as maniacal as he is. In fact, I think the book should have had Barton as more of the villain. Someone who was even more deranged than Slappy, putting the dummy in a situation where he's the one in peril, not our latest kid. I guess that would be tricky to do, but given we so rarely get a story with an evil kid, it would have been such a breath of fresh air aside from what we get. And something fresh for Slappy as well. But, what we get is still enough for another just okay tome in the dummy's life. So that leaves us with a book that's just okay but underwhelming. Save for some of the more recent books, that's the perfect way to describe Slappy as a whole.

STORYGGG
SCARES: GG.5
TWIST: G.5
ENJOYMENT: GG.5
OVERALL: 2.5 Gs

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