The Stinal Countdown: Goosebumps #7: Night of the Living Dummy

And thus, we enter the first book in what would ultimately be Stine's most successful series within Goosebumps. The dummy books. The ones that even if you have the vaguest of memories regarding Goosebumps, you remember the dummies. You remember Slappy. Even if this book really doesn't feture that much of Slappy. Can this saga start on the right foot, or will it end up being too wooden, or just downright knotty? Let's dive into Night of the Living Dummy.

NIGHT OF THE LIVING DUMMY

RELEASE MONTH: May 1993

FRONT TAGLINE: He walks. He Stalks...

COVER STORY

I believe that the reason Goosebumps was as big a success as it was has a lot more to do with the covers and less Stine's actual writing. Not that Stine doesn't on occasion give some decent tales, but this is very much a case where judging a book by its cover was a good thing. And what we have here is the most iconic cover of them all, one that I'm certain led to a ton of childhood trauma. And yes, if skeleton families scared me away, you can bet this little creep did too. But then again, I was scared of Chucky, and given what this cover is meant to illicit, can you blame me?

And I think that's why it's such a great cover. The details on Slappy are incredible. He looks like any ordinary ventriloquist dummy, but given the shadows, his intense eyes and creepy maw, you can't help but be a little bit frightened by what you're seeing. And you wouldn't be blamed for this cover giving you thoughts about what if your toys were alive and what if they were evil and had it out for you. It's freaky, it's well detailed, it's one of Tim Jacobus' absolute best works in the entire franchise.

HE'S NO DUMMY!

Lindy names the new ventriloquist dummy she finds Slappy. Slappy is kind of ugly, but he's a lot of fun. Lindy's having a great time learning to make Slappy move and talk.

But Kris is jealous of all the attention her sister is getting. It's no fair. Why does Lindy always have all the luck?

Kris decides to get a dummy of her own. She'll show Lindy.

Then weird things begin to happen. Nasty things. Evil things.

No way a dummy can be causing all the trouble.

Or is there?

Also, a quick sidenote since I'm sure someone will try to bring it up, yes, there are copies of this book that botch the back blurb, having it read "Kris decides to get a dummy of her own. She'll show Kris.", which includes the copy I'm reading for this re-read. Yeah Kris, you show yourself!

STORY

Lindy and Kris Powell are a pair of ultra-competitive twins. They constantly bicker with one another, much to the annoyance of their mother. The two head outside and notice the new house being built next door. And since kids in these books never can control their curiosity, they go inside the unfinished house and gawk for a while before hearing noises outside. They notice a dumpster by the house and check inside, and inside they find a body! They panic that someone dumped a kid in a dumpster until they realize this body is made out of wood. It's a ventriloquist dummy. Lindy is excited, as she always had an interest in ventriloquism, while Kris is mostly just annoyed. Lindy names the dummy Slappy, mostly because she likes the idea of slapping Kris in the face. More like Night of the Lame Origins so far.

It doesn't take long for Lindy to start becoming a hit with Slappy as she's asked to entertain the Marshall kids for twenty bucks. Kris remains in her tsundere mentality over it all, but as things continue to escalate, she gets more and more jealous, now wanting a dummy of her own. Cut to a few days later and Mr. Powell happens to do just that, getting Kris her own dummy named Mr. Wood. Come on, Slappy? Mr. Wood? Take your euphemisms somewhere else, Stine! Mr. Wood looks similar to Slappy, only with red hair, sneakers, jeans and a flannel shirt. Because not even dummies could escape the grunge look. 

Kris tries to perform with Mr. Wood, but isn't very good, but her hubris won't allow her to just admit defeat to Lindy. Meanwhile, Lindy continues to be a hit with kids, and we are teased the scene of Lindy performing a rap routine with Slappy. If ever I wanted R.L. Stine to have put something on paper, it's that. And then, of course, strange things begin to happen. Lindy sets up her clothes for the next day, then wakes up only to find Mr. Wood has been dressed in the clothing. However Lindy says that she didn't do it. Later, Lindy tries to give Kris pointers on how to use Mr. Wood (oh my god, Stine!) then pretends that the dummy's the one hurling insults, not her. Later, Kris wakes up in the middle of the night to see Mr. Wood positioned in a way that it looks like he's strangling Slappy, but again Lindy doesn't cop to it. Finally it reaches the crescendo when Kris discovers Mr. Wood in front of the open fridge, its contents spilled all over the floor. Mom is obviously pissed, so Lindy finally cops to everything. She was the one behind all the pranks with Mr. Wood. 

Some time passes, and Kris is fixing up Mr. Wood when she notices a piece of paper in Mr. Wood's pocket. She looks at the paper and notices some strange words. Karru Marri Odonna Loma Molonu Karrano. No clue if those words are based on anything, or just words Jovial Bob just plucked out of thin air, but these are the words that will be important to every dummy book going forward. But Kris just reads them out loud, not thinking much of it. Their neighbors, an elderly couple named The Millers have arrived, ready to be entertained by Kris and Mr. Wood. However, Mr. Wood instead hurls harsh insults at everyone and Kris gets blamed for it. Cut to the school auditorium where Kris is set to perform with Mr. Wood. However, once again it's Mr. Wood hurling harsh insults, particularly over the weight of the music teacher Mrs. Berman. And then, straight outta Exorcist, Mr. Wood begins to vomit a pea soup-like substance all over the school. 

Everyone obviously wants to kill Kris over this, despite her pleas that the school incident wasn't her intent, but no one believes her. That night however, Kris finally sees Mr. Wood moving on his own (good lord, you really can't write this without it sounding lewd). Mr. Wood is indeed alive, and tells Kris that she will be his slave. The slave thing really has never been well detailed in these stories. Like what exactly does a ventriloquist dummy need a human slave for? I think mostly it's just a veiled threat in hopes it will keep the kid scared of them. But despite those threats, Kris manages to fight with him and get him back into her closet. She tries to get her parents to believe her, but they don't because Goosebumps parents. Lindy however does believe her, as she did see the struggle they had. 

Mr. Wood comes back to life after the parents leave, and tells Kris that the magic words brought him to life. Kris manages to get the paper back and reads the magic words out loud, only for them to not work, as those words only bring dummies to life, not put them back to sleep. Which now that I realize it, that kinda gets retconned down the line. After the kids try to pull off Mr. Wood's head (oh my god, I'm going to be on a registry), they decide that they should just bury him in the construction area next door. They do so, but it doesn't matter, he's back the very next morning. After their parents leave again, Mr. Wood continues to cause chaos, choking their dog Barky, who is ANOTHER TERRIER, STINE YOU LAZY HACK! Also, more animal abuse. 

Lindy and Kris manage to free Barky from Mr. Wood. The battle makes it into the construction site where Barky almost gets run over by a bulldozer. Mr. Wood breaks free and begins to run off, only to end up crushed by a steamroller in Looney Tunes-esque fashion. A strange green gas leaves the remains of Mr. Wood, while the operator is worried that he murdered a kid, but more relieved that he just killed Pinocchio. 

TWIST ENDING

Lindy and Kris return home, happy to be finished dealing with Mr. Wood. However, when they enter their room, Slappy begins to speak, telling the girls that he thought Mr. Wood would never leave.

CONCLUSION

I have read almost every dummy book at this point, a stark difference from when I first read this book and reviewed it. And I think coming back to the original Night of the Living Dummy, I feel a bit more lenient towards it than I was previously. Some things do work in this first outing. Particularly the relationship between Kris and Lindy which does feel believable with how they bicker and take shots at one another on a regular basis. It feels like how siblings would treat one another. The book is paced fine enough, and if you didn't realize the whole swerve with Lindy being the culprit through most of the early dummy incidents, I could see this working for kids and coming off quite creepy. And when we do get Mr. Wood, he does come off as a scary foe, although easier to defeat than you'd expect. 

So, what are the issues I have? Well, I can't fully forgive this book for being the template that nearly all dummy books would emulate going forward. The slavery talk is never that well established, again feeling like a threat and not anything that really feels that worrisome. Because Mr. Wood, despite his claim of having powers and can make Kris and Lindy's lives miserable, is really easy to defeat. For all the bravado, he's still just a ventriloquist dummy. I also wish Mr. Wood had a bit more personality, but that's a fate that befalls Slappy as well, so it's more an issue with all the dummies. There's also the magic words not putting Mr. Wood back to sleep, and while I can't fault this book because it's the first, seeing as I just finished Slappy Birthday To You, which does make the magic words put Slappy back to sleep, it feels like an odd retcon to make. But then again, Goosebumps sequels do far worse retcons than that.

So in the end, I ended up liking this a little more. It's plot is kinda dry, but it does well enough in some of its creepy visuals and even scenes like the dog strangulation. And the twist does lead us into Slappy as the one to take the mannequin mantle. But with that said, does Night of the Living Dummy II stand a chance of me liking it more? Still a ways to go until then. For now, I simply say knock on wood.

STORY: GG.5

SCARES: GGG

TWIST: GGG

ENJOYMENT: GG

OVERALL: 2.5 Gs