Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Horrific Hindsight: Goosebumps HorrorLand & Hall of Horrors


So, before this Horrific Hindsight was made, I was originally considering doing a series of reread blogs on HorrorLand similar to what I did with the original 62. Offering a fresh coat of paint to my original reviews of these books. My sticking point however was that there is a fear of repetition. That what I offer from those blogs won't be new enough to warrant a reread blog. The tried and true case of "You can see the bind I'm in". But I still wanted to talk about Goosebumps HorrorLand and with the anniversary coming up, the time felt right. Because I think it's time to talk about Stine's most ambitious attempt with Goosebumps, the return of the brand after an eight year hiatus, and how these books held up. Also, since Hall of Horrors started as a HorrorLand spinoff, they're in the pile as well. Let's look back at HorrorLand with this Horrific Hindsight.

When I last talked about Goosebumps for this section, we ended in the year 2000. Series 2000 came to an end as Stine chose not to renew his contract with Scholastic. Years of legal squabbles and a rights war over the brand had soured the parties from working with one another for the time being. Not that Goosebumps had soured from Stine, however, as he wanted to continue with a new series, Goosebumps Gold, which would be darker horror stories featuring classic Goosebumps characters and stories. Three books were known from the initial plans, Happy Holidays From Dead House, The Haunted Mask Lives!, and because you can't get rid of him, Slappy New Year. Despite the plan, and even bringing Tim Jacobus in for the cover artwork, it never made it past initial plans, with Jacobus only making two out of the three covers and Stine moving on from the project, creating The Nightmare Room instead.

Goosebumps Gold is the ultimate piece of Goosebumps vaporware. The one thing I'd have loved to have seen come to fruition. The only downside is that it seemed like it was mostly going to be sequels, not dissimilar from what would happen years later. But Goosebumps Gold proved to be fool's gold and never happened. And, as they say, "time heals all wounds." Bob and Jane Stine rekindled their relationship with Scholastic and in 2003 Goosebumps was back... in reprint format. Brand new reprints of the original 62 books began circulation for the next five years, with all but five books being released in the reprint. The final three, Werewolf Skin (which did get an ebook), I Live In Your Basement! and Monster Blood IV, the randomly skipped Legend of the Lost Legend, and the confusingly absent Phantom of the Auditorium. The books sold very well and kept the brand relevant enough in an age where it was no longer the ruler of kids books. 

Stine continues with his other works like Rotten School and Mostly Ghostly, all while Goosebumps continues to be reprinted. Then, Scholastic comes up with an idea for some new Goosebumps media. In this case, graphic novels. In 2006 came Goosebumps Graphix, a trilogy of books, each with three classic stories, illustrated by different artists. Creepy Creatures (The Werewolf of Fever Swamp, The Abominable Snowman of Pasadena and The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight), Terror Trips (Deep Trouble, One Day at HorrorLand and A Shocker on Shock Street) and Scary Summer (The Horror at Camp Jellyjam, Ghost Beach and Revenge of the Lawn Gnomes) all released from 2006 to 2007 and sold very well. Well enough that suddenly there was interest not just with Scholastic, but with R.L. Stine to continue Goosebumps for real. 

And, in 2008, Goosebumps returned with HorrorLand. But not just another new book series. This one was going to be a big return for Goosebumps. Starting with the gimmick of HorrorLand being a long running saga within the stories. Each book would start with the main story, then the main characters of those stories would end up in HorrorLand as the book sets up a mystery that plays out through the first twelve books. But not only that, there would be rereleases coinciding with the new books, where each book had a neat "token" motif where the backs connected. A website would launch featuring the park itself and many of its unique attractions. A video game would be released for Wii, PS2 and DS. It was as grandiose a return that you could ever expect something like Goosebumps would get. 

The book series started with twelve books. Six of the books were new stories featuring new villains like Inspector Cranium, Dr. Maniac, the egg lizard aliens and Camp Slither, with the final two being the two-part finale to the story. while the other six were new sequels to Monster Blood, Say Cheese and Die, Deep Trouble, The Haunted Mask, The Mummy and, of course, Night of the Living Dummy. Slappy, of course being the villain of the first new book. After the main story ends, the protagonist of the story would receive an invitation to HorrorLand, where they would end up lost in the park, trying to survive its bizarre attractions, and learning the real villain of the story is the mysterious "Karloff Mennis", or "The Menace", the owner of Panic Park, which is trapped in a time warp with HorrorLand on top of it. 

Not along for the ride this time was Tim Jacobus, who had moved on from the franchise after the Goosebumps Gold plans fizzled. In his stead was an artist by the name of Brandon Dorman. A lot of people, at least initially, were mixed on Dorman's style as it lacked the details and visual flair of Jacobus' work. But where Dorman always succeeded is monster designs and creep factor. And as the books continued to come out, the better the art got and the more Dorman's style gelled with what Goosebumps was meant to be. 

After the first twelve books finished, another seven were released (Eight if you count the survival guide). This time, things were shifted around. The opening had the protagonist of the story already at HorrorLand before the events of the story. After running into a strange individual at the park, they're directed towards a strange gift shop run by the even stranger Jonathan Chiller. Chiller would give the protagonist an item that would be important to the plot of the story to follow, along with a miniature Horror figure. These figures would send the protagonist back to HorrorLand as Chiller had planned this all along. See, Chiller had been suffering from the trauma of being emasculated by his father after failing at a hunting trip and shooting his own foot with an arrow. It broke Chiller to the point that eventually he would try to prove that he was a great hunter by hunting children. Namely the six children who crossed his path. 

After the Jonathan Chiller saga came one more HorrorLand arc... kinda. You see, originally, the next six books were to be called HorrorLand: Hall of Horrors. But the title got dropped before release and it became simply Hall of Horrors. Even less connected together, each story opens and ends with a protagonist, the mysterious Story-Keeper, introducing the reader to the protagonist of the story before we get the story itself. This format would be one that Goosebumps would keep using in subsequent series. Less so in Most Wanted, but back with a vengeance in SlappyWorld, and probably will be back with House of Shivers. Hall of Horrors lasted six books as previously stated and would be followed by Most Wanted, ending the ambitious saga of HorrorLand. And now that I've done the heavy lifting part of talking about HorrorLand and Hall of Horrors, it's time for my thoughts on both series as a whole. Time for another case of Horrific Hindsight.


I'll start with the logo. I hate the revival logo. Not in an angry way, but in a "this feels lacking" sort of way. The oozing slime aesthetic is neat, but I've always thought it looks less like freaky slime and more like foam. The white variant in particular always looking a bit like shaving cream and... well... it looks like something else, but I'll abstain. Ultimately, it doesn't have the more raw staying power of the original Goosebumps logo. Thankfully the cover artwork by Brandon Dorman softens the blow of the logo. With maybe Revenge of the Living Dummy as the only real mediocre cover of the bunch, the rest do a solid job in selling the story they're presenting. I also love the concept of the back covers and the half-token idea. Adds a slightly special touch to some of those rereleases.

We'll start with arc one, then arc two, and follow-up with my thoughts on Hall of Horrors before my ranking. I'll also cover the main stories in the countdown. I like the idea of arc one, but I also feel it's very lacking, or at the very least, Stine was making it up as we go along, as for the most part, most of the parts in the story don't matter until the final two books. It's a new kid arrives in HorrorLand, deals with a specific attraction or runs into the other kids and some shenanigans happen until we eventually get to the fireworks factory with Escape From HorrorLand and The Streets of Panic Park. And even then it feels like he doesn't completely have an idea of what he wants the story to be. I love the concept of Panic Park being trapped in a time limbo. I love the idea of Karloff Mennis. But I've always been annoyed that the Horrors felt less important here. 

Save for Byron, the Horrors barely even feel like side characters, so much so that The Menace doesn't even have them as his minions, it's the shades instead. So when I saw that HorrorLand was being adapted, I was excited because I love the concept of the Horrors. And the first book, the only one I read as a kid, always came off as such a neat idea about this park of actual monsters and how it's a literal tourist trap. Here, the Horrors aren't that important, and the park has gone from tourist trap to an attraction that just exists and people can come and go as they please. HorrorLand got gentrified and I think that's sad. So much potential that feels like Stine on the fly and less like he had a fully thought out idea that would benefit HorrorLand as a whole.

And I can easily say that's the case because arc two feels better handled. Again, roughshod in a lot of ways, especially with Weirdo Halloween, but the idea is way better handled. Do the HorrorLand stuff first, tell the main story, then the quick wrap up, giving us the bigger story in the finale. And, again, the Horrors feel unimportant, as does most of the park in general, but the story builds Jonathan Chiller up long enough, and his disguised encounters throughout each story matter to the overall plot. I also like Chiller more than the Menace, feeling like his origin makes for a better villain. Morally broken, wanting to avenge the trauma of his past in the worst possible way. And we get a story overall that feels like Stine put thought into it, save for, again, Weirdo Halloween which decides to just have Chiller screw with Meg for less defined reasons (other than SPECIAL EDITION BOOK). 

And then there's Hall of Horrors which exists. Part of me thinks Stine wanted to do more with the Story-Keeper, but after the last two attempts, tried even less this time. So this character is just relegated to intro and outro stuff and that's it. Probably the ultimate example of the problem with HorrorLand's structure overall. Stine was ambitious, but lacking in the ability to stick to a compelling thru-line for a series of books. 

As for the stories themselves, most of them are decent. A solid mix of sequels and new stories. And, much like Goosebumps in general, they're a mix of quality. Some great horror, some really bad horror. And because of the structure of the stories, the twists suffer as a result. Things like Michael's parents eating the alien egg cake and turning into monsters, or the aliens showing up at Meg and Chris' place don't matter in the end because they have to be brushed aside to move on to the HorrorLand story. So twists lack as much oomph as they should. Some work, while most are pretty meager. 

So, with the thoughts out of the way, it's time for the ranking. We have 25 books this time to cover over two different series. What were the best and worst in my eyes? Let's rank them.

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#25: THE BIRTHDAY PARTY OF NO RETURN! (HOH #06): No book in this batch made it to an F, but a couple hit D. And none were more deserving of that D than The Birthday Party of No Return! Why? Well, first off, the title matters so little to the actual story. I think Claws would have made more sense, but Stine blew his load early, so less important birthday party it is. But that doesn't save it from having unlikable characters all around. Lee isn't likable at all. He starts the book sympathetic, but after losing his good luck and willingly trying to screw Cory over, it's all over for him. Cory's okay, but show-off-ish as well. And of course Laura's just awful for screwing both her friends over for a trip to sports camp. Again, hope it was Jellyjam. The luck-based stories have been done much better and the horror mostly feels nonexistent save for the looming feeling of a vulture stalking Lee. What keeps it from an F is Lee and Cory's stoned-out-of-their-trees bird fight in the auditorium. The silver lining of one of Stine's worst.


#24: DR. MANIAC VS ROBBY SCHWARTZ (HL #05): I think this book has a neat idea and Dr. Maniac is even a neat concept for a villain. What kills this book however is that none of it matters. Not just in the fact that none of it ACTUALLY happens given the multiple fake-outs, but Stine just retcons Dr. Maniac as always existing, and even showing up in later books despite supposedly being the creation of Robby Schwartz. It's the Sarabeth-Monster Blood stuff all over again and that's what kills the book for me. I wish I could rate it higher if only for my beloved Purple Rage, but no amount of his rage-fueled insanity can salvage this book from being lame.


#23: HELP! WE HAVE STRANGE POWERS! (HL #10): This book has a cool idea but I freaking hate the protagonists. Jillian and Jackson just suck as characters to follow. I get it. The Lerner siblings are klutzes (mostly to hide from Inspector Cranium), but Jillian and Jackson just come off as more rotten than redeeming. No, seriously. I'd prefer it to have been Nina and Artie as the focus and not the sorta-antagonists-not-really-either? The pair of klutzy losers managing to succeed at least a little while overcoming their bullies in Jillian and Jackson, while also having to overcome the maniacal Inspector Cranium, who I want to keep calling Dr. Cranium for some reason. Mostly because he feels more like a mad scientist that it messes with my head. Some might have liked this more, but nah, not for me.


#22: REVENGE OF THE LIVING DUMMY (HL #01): I just do not like this book. Maybe that's really why it's not higher up than it should be, but still. What works is there is a decent enough change to the formula with Ethan being the one who's the villain and not Slappy, who has been controlled like a robot, so not only is Ethan evil, he's an evil genius. But when we do get Slappy for real, there's not much of him to really make it worth the wait. I also wish there was more of a point to the mind stealer as it just feels like a macguffin and nothing else. Other than that, there's really very little meat to it. Meet the new bumps, mostly the same as the old bumps.


#21: THE WIZARD OF OOZE (HL #17): I don't get how it feels like, save for maybe Attack of the Mutant depending on who you ask, Stine's comic book stories have constantly been letdowns. And likely no more disappointing than Wizard of Ooze. Dr. Maniac is bad for more reasons than just the comic book stuff, this one just feels like such a lacking book. This one's just bland. Some cool ideas like The Ooze and "Legally-Distinct-Enough Human Torch". But pacing's a bit of a mess and any time the book gets interesting it goes away quickly like Marco's powers. Not awful, just underwhelming.


#20: WHY I QUIT ZOMBIE SCHOOL (HOH #04): This has a cool premise but ultimately feels lacking. A lot of shuffling in the middle much like a zombie. It also annoys me that Matt, big horror buff, never calls out how everyone, and the school in general, is a horror reference of some sort. The twist stinks, but honestly I'd have preferred if THAT was the book. Stine doesn't do many vampires, so it would have been neat. Then maybe I'd have wanted a Zombie book instead if he had botched it. Can't win either way, I guess.


#19: THE FIVE MASKS OF DR. SCREEM (HOH #03): God I wish this one was good, but it just isn't. At least for me. There's a great idea involving Bella and Dr. Screem, the search for these mysterious masks. The book that can change reality. Monica and Peter start off annoying but are overall decent. I just wish the masks mattered more. Hell, we don't even get to see what the Alien Pig Mask was about. It could have just been four masks and nothing was lost. It also just feels like it ends, lacking a punchy enough twist. Far from the worst of the worst, but still very meh.


#18: SLAPPY NEW YEAR (HL #18): Hey, remember when I mentioned Goosebumps Gold and Stine holding on to a title? Was it worth the wait for Slappy New Year? Nah. A better effort than Revenge, but suffers from feeling too much like the dummy formula to ever feel new or unique. You'd think Stine would learn to improve the Slappy formula over time, and while SlappyWorld has a few unique ideas, it's mostly more of the same. I think it's less frustrating than Revenge of the Living Dummy and you actually get more Slappy and not just Robo-Slappy, but otherwise it's just a case of "here we go again."


#17: WEIRDO HALLOWEEN (HL #16): The first Special Edition book, it's at least better than Wanted: The Haunted Mask. Is that enough praise? Or at least like half of the book, because the first part with Bim is decent. Not the most amazing story, but the adventures of Meg and Chris dealing with this alien do make for as solid a Goosebumps story as you could ask for. It's the other half that I'm not fond of. Meg returning to HorrorLand and having a crisis of reality as she may or may not be the real Meg Oliver. It's a way more annoying story than the former and, ultimately, matters far less than anything else in the Jonathan Chiller arc. Still, there have been much, much worse examples of Special Editions going off the rails. 


#16: NIGHT OF THE GIANT EVERYTHING (HOH #02): So, this book got an A- in my rating initially, but realistically dropped down a bit overtime. I still like it, but hindsight is a cruel mistress. Because while Night of the Giant Everything is a fun sendup of the shrinking genre, albeit perhaps a bit too on rails for its own good, there was already a far better shrinking story by R.L. Stine years prior in The Adventures of Shrinkman. Doesn't help this book that Steven's a really unlikable protagonist at first. He gets better but not by much. I like a lot of the saga initially, including the entire battle he has trying to get out of his house to get to Ava's, but the latter half is a mixed bag, with the Bugsy reveal and twist being weak by comparison to how Shrinkman did all of it so much better. So, congrats to Giant Everything for being hindsight-cucked?


#15: MY FRIENDS CALL ME MONSTER (HL #07): I think what holds this one back is the kneecapping of the twist, because it's a decent twist, built up just right in a solid story about egg lizard monsters, a boy who turns into one of the monsters, aliens and possibly the Chicken Lady from Kids in the Hall. This story remains the biggest victim of the "twists won't matter" nature of the HorrorLand stories, especially with how Michael half-assedly tells us that "oh, I managed to turn my parents back, so no big deal." An otherwise decent book that could have made it higher if not for unfortunate circumstances.


#14: LITTLE SHOP OF HAMSTERS (HL #14): Hamster. Wrestling. League. That should be enough to call this amazing, but hindsight's dropped it a shade under the top 10. But I still think this one is just okay, and for once the misdirect isn't as bad as it usually is. If not for how over the top Mr. Fitz's big "Giant Hamster Media Empire" plan was, this book would ultimately be the very example of "eh." So it at least earns point for a creatively insane villain. Kudos Bob, kudos.


#13: HEADS, YOU LOSE! (HL #15): This one fell a bit over time, but it's not the worst time travel story. What hurts it is a lot of chapters that run around in circles with Jessica and Ryan constantly pleading for their innocence. Probably the most egregious example of Stine padding. You could say it's running like a chicken with its head cut off, or in this case, a prince. The stuff in the past is at least interesting and there's an okay mystery, even if the culprits are super obvious, even for Stine. This book is headless, but thankfully not hopeless.


#12: WELCOME TO CAMP SLITHER (HL #09): What a diggity-ding-dong-dang-diggity-darn book this one was. A decent camp story with some solid horror in the snakes of Camp Slither. Another case of villains that actually do feel like a threat for the most part. And the creep factor of the Sun-Glo being snake DNA that can turn kids into snakes is a creepy scenario. Also Stine is aware of what Manga is, and that concerns me for some reason. Not in the upper tier of camp books, but nowhere in the doldrums. An otherwise solid effort.


#11: CLAWS! (HOH #01): Claws! is a decent start for the series. And I think a lot of that has to do with how interesting the concept of Cat Heaven is. How it can bring pets back to life, but they ultimately have to continue their cycle, dying in the same manner over and over again. There's also some decent horror and you have a sympathetic character in Mickey Coe to follow. The only real issue is the tension over if Mickey has to be the owner of the dead cats afterwards, only for it to not matter because killing them again resets it all? And, oh yeah, there's a lot of animal violence in this one, including cats being run over. Feels like Stine was pent up to finally add it to a Goosebumps book instead of a Fear Street for once. 


#10: DON'T SCREAM! (HOH #05): You know, given the rise in AI everywhere now, this book is a shade ahead of its time. In this case a rogue AI that makes someone's life miserable. Emmy is a rare revival villain that does feel like an actual threat, how she hurts Jack a lot and threatens to hurt his loved ones. We don't fully get what Emmy is about, or if her story is even true, and the twist kind of stinks, but otherwise, this is a decent "evils of science" story from Stine. 


#09: CREEP FROM THE DEEP (HL #02): I feel like you're in two camps: You like Deep Trouble, or you don't like Deep Trouble. It's a very middle ground book saga. Its sequel more so feels under-loved, even by me initially. Which is a shame that Creep From the Deep feels even more under-loved than Deep Trouble II. There's a lot of action, some tension with the sub, creepy villains like Long Ben One-Leg and the two pirates that trick the Deep family. It's one of the better action stories Stine has done, and that's a shame. Though, Billy still feels like Billy for good and bad reasons. It's also another book that suffers on account of its twist not mattering at all given we go straight to HorrorLand after, but not as bothersome as when it befell My Friends Call Me Monster. Just underrated enough is the fairest assessment.


#08: THE STREETS OF PANIC PARK (HL #12): I really wanted to like this one more. It has some really neat ideas. The Menace, the fear meter, the concept of Panic Park being in this time limbo. And even the big finale where the monsters and villains actually aid the kids is such a cool thing. It just feels like a disappointment. This whole series was called HORRORLAND, yet the finale is about a bad guy from another park and the horrors (save for Byron) don't matter at all in the long run. It speaks mainly to my problem with HorrorLand's execution. Going from tourist trap to legit theme park just comes off as lame. Also Menace had this big plan in motion, sent the invites to HorrorLand and all, but what if some kid couldn't go? Wouldn't that screw the plan up? He's just not that interesting a big bad. And given the book has to dump so much lore, it really keeps it from being better than it has any right to be. What puts it up here is the solid horror in scenes and enough of a finale feel to this arc that it doesn't completely suffer. 


#07: MONSTER BLOOD FOR BREAKFAST (HL #03): Monster Blood finally got a good book again. Not a perfect book, but finally ditching Evan and the Goof Troop and in turn taking away any of the cat-witch origins of the saga for new ground was the saving grace for this story. You do feel for Matt in the story, not just for what befalls him with the Monster Blood, but for having to deal with one of the series' worst characters by design in Bradly Wormzer. The only downside is way too much "naked child" in this book to the point of uncomfortable, but it's at least good to have the slime not ultimately be a revenge tool gone wrong. Hell, given the ending, it's a revenge tool gone right for a change.


#06: THE SCREAM OF THE HAUNTED MASK (HL #04): So, much like Slappy New Year, it's unclear if this book has any connection with the scrapped The Haunted Mask Lives! from Goosebumps Gold. But, regardless, it's another case of a really solid sequel. What I like is that the story deals with trauma. Namely Carly Beth's trauma with the original Haunted Mask. Yet for as much as she fears it, she also is drawn to it, as if being controlled by the mask to wear it once more. It makes for such a better reason for a sequel than, say, getting an evil camera back to prove to an asshole teacher that it exists. Even the stuff with the horses and the stuff involving Laura Henry all still work for the story, as does Carly Beth ultimately using the mask once again in the final confrontation. It lacks in twist strength and a bit of dragging, but otherwise, best Goosebumps protagonist wins again.


#05: SAY CHEESE–AND DIE SCREAMING! (HL #08): Another far better sequel than its previous, Say Cheese– And Die Screaming! works thanks in part to new canon for the camera. No more Spidey, no more Greg, no more veering into fat jokes. Just a dangerous camera that feels deadly again. Mostly. Still on the fence on if the bee head and reptile skin helped or harmed it. But they were memorable. It also helps that Julie is more likable. That, yes, she uses the camera one too many times, but unlike Greg in the sequel, at least she realizes soon enough that the camera is a threat and tries to get rid of it, only for fate (IE David Blank) to keep bringing it back to her. I even like added lore like if the photo is stuck in the machinery, the person who the photo was taken of feels like they're being ripped in half. Only downside is the dumb twist, but that's the mildest complaint.


#04: WHO'S YOUR MUMMY? (HL #06): It's incredible. The further we got away from Gabe the better mummy books got. He was the problem the entire time. And this one is solid as well, if only for how creepy it actually feels. Not just the cat that erodes like dust, but Abby and Peter being kidnapped by Tuttan-Ra, and the visual of Tuttan-Ra eating the mummy guts as a way to stay alive. There's a lot of action in this one and the twist, if you can actually call it that, is one I like. It leaves you asking if these were already the mummy guts that Tuttan-Ra was using, or if Abby, Peter and the real Uncle Jonathan did the ritual with one of the other mummies to make the meal for Granny Vee to save her. It's the right call, I can see why they did it, but it also feels just dark enough in its implications. And you don't get enough Goosebumps with that dark feel to them, so this is an easy winner.


#03: WHEN THE GHOST DOG HOWLS (HL #13): Hey would you look at that? A better Be Careful What You Wish For...  it must be my lucky day. And for this book, it's pretty lucky as it's the best non-arc story in HorrorLand and Hall of Horrors (to me at least). I love the concept of the Blue Kerlew Hound and the idea of the tooth in general. How it can be your ticket to happiness, but just as quickly your downfall when the hound returns. And the conflict is actually interesting for once. Andy gets the tooth and starts to find success until he has this weird shock and even stranger mental trip, only for his cousin Marnie to trick him out of the tooth and uses it for her own greed. And even when the hound comes back, she wants to keep the tooth and hasn't fully learned her lesson. It's frustrating, but on point for once. I will say the trippy part is the weakest, but otherwise, for a horror story, it does the job. One of the best of the revival era.


#02: THE HORROR AT CHILLER HOUSE (HL #19): The better finale. Mainly because it feels a lot stronger a story in itself than the previous final part of a HorrorLand plot. Less characters to follow, and more of a focus on Jonathan Chiller himself. And he's an interesting villain for once. Driven to madness after the hunting trip gone awry, and mentally broken to the point he has these multiple identities, he feels like a threat, and is built up better than Karloff Mennis is at least. It also does what many would think to be unthinkable. Stine ACTUALLY sticks the landing. Granted the "here we go again" ending is weak, but it at least works here. I don't buy into the idea that Chiller wouldn't try this again. He's evil enough to keep trying to hunt kids for sport until he finally succeeds. Solid villain, solid conclusion.


#01: ESCAPE FROM HORRORLAND (HL #11): No book got an A+ in HorrorLand. But only one got an A, and it's the penultimate HorrorLand arc one story. It's a story filled with more action, more set pieces, a lot less feel shuffling, save for the kids not fully trusting Luke and Lizzy. And yes, THAT moment with Carly Beth and Sabrina. Again, most likely innocuous but that caught me way the hell off guard. And any book with Carly Beth, best protagonist, as a semi-focus at the very least wins in my book. I wish it paid off with a stronger last book, but in my eyes, it's everything HorrorLand could have been if Stine had a better thru-line from beginning to end and is, again to me, the best HorrorLand story.

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HorrorLand was Stine at his most ambitious. I can believe he didn't just go into this without an idea. Nor did Scholastic. The heavy advertising it got through the website, the video games, and the books, were unique, especially for Goosebumps. And I can appreciate the attempt. But I'll also say that for as ambitious as it was, it wasn't that well done. Too many characters clog this story which could have been truncated to a mere few. Most parts feel like going in circles with only slivers of progression. The mystery isn't as compelling or deep, or ever feeling like something that could reward the reader for solving. It's a great idea, just executed weakly. So much so that it's never been a thing since.

The second arc is much better because it's more truncated. Less characters, the setup stuff being at the prologue, playing better into the main story. It was also the right length of books. Seven is an easier story to progress through more cleanly than twelve. And while it had a better finale in my eyes, it also just feels like it exists. Which feels so unfair, but also true. HorrorLand, just like the park and monsters that bare its name, exists. Exists but feels so pointless in its existence. You could have set the book anywhere, even just Panic Park, and you wouldn't have lost anything. HorrorLand just feels like it was there to attract readers and that's all. HorrorLand and the Horrors became Superfluous Clay.

Hall of Horrors doesn't feel as ambitious, and while the stories are weak and the Story-Keeper an unimportant entity, I will say that it just comes off as so much better because of that lack of an overarching plot. Just a return to Goosebumps stories being in their own plane of existence and nothing else. I just really wish those stories were much better, or didn't feel like lower level redos of far better attempts by Stine. Don't Scream!, at least feels like the most ambitious. Working in a "baby's first Black Mirror" sort of way. The rest, especially the final book, are all just existent. Too short to leave an impact, and a sign that Stine wanted to start fresh far sooner with Most Wanted, which will get its own Horrific Hindsight very soon.

This April will mark fifteen years of the Goosebumps revival. For an even more incredible stat, it will roughly be twice as long as the seven and a half years of the 90s run. HorrorLand has existed that long ago. And, if anything else, I can at least appreciate that Goosebumps continued at all. Whether it was truly HorrorLand that saved it, I'm just glad to still have Goosebumps back. It's not as nostalgic as the 90s, or for the most part even close to as good, but it's just cool to see this franchise move forward and Stine still being up to this whole weird franchise of his. Here's to fifteen freaking weird years, HorrorLand. Thanks for the memories. 

Next up: What happens when Stine is fully free from the shackles of HorrorLand? Does the quality improve, weaken, or business as usual? We'll see what the Goosebumps world becomes when it becomes Most Wanted. 

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