Now, Goosebumps! Now, Shadow Zone! Now, Animorphs and Shivers!
On, Fear Street! On, Coville! On, Pike and Bone Chillers!
To the top of the blog! To the bookshelf on the wall!
Now write away! Write away! Write away all!
As yellowed pages that before the writing did fly
When they meet with bad writing, pivot to the sky
So up to the blog, the reviews did flew
With more Fear Street books to review
And then came a sequel to a book quite aloof
Silent Night 2? This book's real, there's proof!
As I finished the first, and was turning around
This sequel to this book could surely be found
With a terrible protagonist who treats people like crap?
Has Reva improved and is this book more than pap?
Will it succeed to improve or fall apart?
Let's quash this bad rhyming and it's time to start.
We open with Paul Nichols returning to his apartment. Two weeks before Christmas and he hasn't been able to find any work, which bothers him to the point of him having a stammer in his speech. He heads home to find his girlfriend Diane Morris inside. She calls him Pres a lot instead of Paul, mainly due to the fact that Paul can pull of the Elvis Presley sneer, so we're calling him Pres as well. While he's desperate for work, Pres has his standards and won't just take a grocery job. He did have a decent job as a stock boy for Dalby's, but was fired for trying to steal a stereo, even getting chewed out by Mr. Robert Dalby himself. And Pres took it hard as he definitely wants revenge on Mr. Dalby for firing him, so he and Diane have been thinking of robbing the Dalby mansion. But instead of just taking some of his valuable trinkets, they should take his most prized possession. They should kidnap his daughter Reva.
As for Reva, she still has memories of last Christmas. Of Mr. Wakely about to shoot her before falling off the balcony and being fried by electronics. Oh, remember that whole "not being god awful to people" resolution she made? Considering she won't bother to help any customers, and laughs at them as they leave, we're still dealing with the same awful Reva. After mocking a woman for her weight, she then notices Kyle Storer. Kyle's been keen on her for a while but she's not receptive, going so far to intentionally spill her bottle of water on his chinos to make him take the hint. Dude, I don't know the degree of bad Kyle is, but run dude. Run to the hills.
Pam is also back and she does have a job at Dalby's this time, so at least she's not desperate enough to rob the place this time around. She even has a boyfriend, Victor Dias. So, hey, there's our conflict this time around because of course Reva wants Victor for herself. After victor leaves, Reva talks about how her purple and black nails will bother Miss Smith who also works at Dalby's when Pam jabs her with a letter opener. That's concerning. But it's a fake letter opener made of rubber. Okay then.
Reva talks with her father later on and we get exposition that her brother Michael is in St. Croix for Christmas while she's still here in the store where she still has PTSD from the previous year. She then heads for the elevator before she's grabbed... by her dad warning her that the elevators are broken. Again, something I'm sure will in no way play a part later in the book She heads to the parking lot to get her car and thinks someone's following her. But it's two other employees. As she drives home, she sees a Plymouth behind her which she thinks might be someone following her.
Turns out that concern was warranted as it was Pres following her. He's been doing it a lot lately to check her routine out. To find the best opportunity to pull off the kidnapping. He knows that Mr. Dalby leaves his home at seven with Reva exiting at nine and a maid coming in shortly after. There's a dog, but it's normally chained up. So Diane believes that their perfect opportunity is kidnapping her between 7-9. And they plan to do that as soon as possible.
As for Victor, it didn't take too long for him to fall for Reva and cheat on Pam. So less of the elaborate break up build of the previous book. Because Reva hates Pam again too and thinks she's a loser. Really? One more book after this one? Fine. The next morning after Mr. Dalby leaves, Pres and Diane begin their scheme. Pres sneaks onto the premises, only to find King, the family Doberman, isn't chained up. After a fight with the dog, Pres manages to chloroform the dog. No kicking the dog, breaking its neck or stabbing it? Subduing it in the safest way possible? Are we sure Stine wrote this? He then enters, pistol drawn and searches the mansion for Reva.
Diane notices sirens heading their way, thinking that maybe Pres was caught. However, he's still in the mansion looking over all of the Dalby's possessions like the wide screen TV and the jacuzzi. He thinks of wanting a couple pinball machines at least. While we're spit balling, how about fifty televisions, all tuned into the Oprah Winfrey show? He enters Reva's bedroom... and there's no Reva. With sirens blaring and the cops approaching, he exits the mansion and drives off with Diane, this plan being a bust for now. I mean, duh. We're 55 pages deep into this 196 page book. Stine's going to pad the hell out of this before we get to the point.
Reva's back at Dalby's mentally mocking her co-worker Francine for her nose, lips and looking like she died three weeks ago. God I wish we kidnapped her already. She talks with Pam about being out last night, of course not dropping the Victor reveal. I swear to god this book ends with her again saying she'll be nice next year I'm going to lose my shit. Back to Diane and Pres, they scope the Dalby house again, but now it's swarming with cops. One comes over to them, but just tells them about a broken taillight. So home invasion isn't going to cut it. They're going to have to kidnap her at Dalby's. If they create a distraction they can nab her in time. So they're set to do it on the next day.
Next day arrives and Reva is again mocking Francine by eating a muffin in front of her and noting Francine's diet. So, she mocks fat people and yet when people go on a diet she is also trash to them as well? Yeah, that's more real than I think even Stine expected. Pres and Diane show up and Diane pretends to have lost her contact lens and asks for Reva to help, which is like asking a the statue of Abe Lincoln to do the Roger Rabbit. Pres grabs her, but with everything blown the two head off. Though now they have echoed the sentiments of many a reader at this point, why not just kill her? I mean we really don't need a Silent Night 3.
That thought of killing her comes from Pres' brother Danny who is now in on this whole scheme. But Diane and Pres know that won't do them any good since they need the ransom money. But Danny, being more cold blooded than his younger brother, is more willing to just finish the job however possible. So with Diane and Pres now seen they need Danny to go into the stockroom to kidnap her. So, I'm already guessing where this is going and it's not with Reva being kidnapped, is it? Back to Reva and Pam as we learn that Victor dumped Pam but she doesn't know about what Reva did yet. We then learn that Pres has been arrested, so now the job is squarely on Diane and Danny's hands and Diane doesn't quite trust Danny in making this a clean job.
They arrive at Dalby's as Danny enters the stockroom. Diane is panicky, especially as a cop approaches her. Meanwhile, Danny's got this issue where he has a bad headache, so he's more irritable. He drapes a coat over Reva's head and manages to drag her out of the building while Diane is dealing with the cop telling her to move her vehicle. Danny manages to get inside with Reva and they drive off. Diane and Danny celebrate, saying they'll be millionaires. They head to their place and call Mr. Dalby, saying they have Reva and want one million dollars for her safety. Here's the thing, and yep, it went where we thought it would, they don't have Reva. She's with Mr. Dalby at that very moment. Yeah, turns out they got Pam.
Pam overheard the conversation despite being tied up and blindfolded. She knows that she's here because they thought she was Reva. Danny and Diane force her to tell who she is and Pam has no choice but to oblige. They realize they still have a Dalby even if it's not the one they're after. But Pam says that Mr. Dalby will never pay her ransom since their families aren't close. She wants to be let go, but Danny suggests killing her instead.
So, now Reva knows about Pam being kidnapped. And how does she react to a family member being in trouble? Trying to guilt trip Victor about how it could have been her. REALLY? THERE'S REALLY A THIRD ONE OF THESE? Oh, and of course Mr. Dalby really won't be paying for Pam's kidnapping since he believes it will only inspire other kidnappers. My god, they all suck. Also Reva had some dream about the store being crowded, then the aisles stretch forever and it got quiet. As if someone was chasing after her. Someone grabbed her and tried to kill her dressed as Santa Claus-ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? YOU DID THIS TO ME AGAIN!? ONLY NOW IN SAY CHEESE AND DIE FORM WHERE WE DON'T EVEN GET TO SEE THE DREAM, IT'S TALKED ABOUT AFTER THE FACT!?
WHY. CAN'T. YOU. GIVE. ME. EVIL. SANTA. CLAUS. ROBERT. LAWRENCE. STIIIIIIIIIIIIINE?
So, Danny and Diane dumped Pam on Reva's driveway and are both apparently driving off to Canada in order to hide. Reva tries t o calm her down and comes off as, you know, a nice and caring relative. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Why, here's Mr. Irony arriving just in time in the form of Victor. But, for now Pam is still unaware of that she's being cheated on, since, you know, why not dump on her some more tonight? So this should really all be resolved. Though, since Pres is still around, I can assume we're far from done.
Next day at work, Reva is still edgy. Not just due to Pam's situation but that now she still feels vulnerable. Made no better when she notices a guy in sunglasses and a trench coat following her around. She then follows this fear for her life by still mocking and laughing at customers just wanting service. Also Pam's back and invites her to her house to trim the tree and Reva gets upset at the fact Victor won't be there. HOW DO I STILL HAVE ONE MORE BOOK WITH HER? HOW? HOOOOWWWW? It is galling how we go from a character suffering from tension and a fear for their lives to immediately having her just going back to default "make everyone your enemy". And no, I'm not buying the dead mother excuse this time either.
Reva arrives at Pam's which is on where else fear street I don't care anymore. I can't even fathom enjoying the book being on Fear Street now. Suddenly, Reva gets kidnapped. Yes. Oh and Pam too because this has to happen to her twice I guess. So yeah, Diane and Danny didn't end up in Canada. They're back with Pres to finally get to actually kidnapping Reva. Reva did get a punch in on Pres at least. It's also there where she realizes that even if her dad pays the ransom she and Pam could still be killed and their bodies stuffed at a garbage dump. But these kidnappers have a great idea. And that's... to take them to Dalby's. Of course.
They take Reva and Pam to the fifth floor, which is where the Santa stuff is located. Danny also takes this time to almost break Reva's arm. I don't condone violence against women, but at this point, Reva getting any comeuppance at all is welcome. The girls are taken back to the storeroom. So, why Dalby's? It's the last place they'd suspect. I mean despite the ability to trace the call being from the store and, like, it's 1993 but some form of caller ID is still possible. Danny wants to kill them, but Diane and Pres both believe it's easier to just leave the girls there, get the money and run off when they get the first chance. And then we get the other shoe drop. Pam was in on this the whole time. She led them to Reva.
So, we know why this happened, but to recap: Pam knew about Reva taking Victor from her. She knew that all along. And given that she was kidnapped by mistake by crooks who wanted Reva, that just fueled enough reasons for her to want to screw over Reva. But she also didn't expect to be kidnapped again for real. And no, I still don't find this makes her worse than Reva. Pam gives her the riot act that Reva has it so easy and still treats others terribly for no good reason. This conversation is abruptly ended when Danny punches Pam out. Still didn't kill her, but now Pam has a concussion to match Reva's broken arm. Pam comes to and apologizes to Reva and no-NO! YOU DON'T GET A CHANCE TO REDEEM REVA, BOOK. YOU LOST THAT CHANCE AGES AGO. Especially since there is still another book of this.
With one last shot, the girls manage to run for it while the kidnappers argue. The kidnappers give chase, but Reva and Pam split up. Reva ends up running into a mannequin of Santa and a whole bunch of other mannequins. That's the cover for the third book, so if that doesn't happen in that, hey, at least it actually happened somewhere in the saga so that's a step forward. The girls regroup and head to the broken elevators to lead the three into falling to their deaths. Except nope. The elevator's been fixed already so that didn't play a role. Suddenly, the man in the trench coat arrives. Turns out it's an FBI agent. So yeah, like I said, the worst idea ever. Danny isn't going to go down without killing Pam and Reva so he draws his gun on them. Pam manages to get a hold of the gun as Danny panics and runs for the elevator, getting the one that was actually broken. See, it played a part after all. And so the book ends with Pam and Reva's parents arriving and Reva noticing Silent Night is playing. At least she didn't make any resolutions this year. Oh my god I'm dreading the third book.
Oh good lord this book sucked. Positives out of the way early. There's at least a lot of action and suspense in the latter half of the book. And the kidnapping plot concept is fine, even with the misdirect of kidnapping Pam. And that's it. That's all the positives because this book was bad. Even if I didn't get the scene from the cover play out (my fault again in putting too much stock in those, I guess), there is just nothing to like about this one. The structure is far weaker. The focus of the first book was that Reva's actions came back to haunt her until she ultimately came to (or was in this case straight up told) the realization that her actions have made her a bad person. So you'd hope this book would follow up on that and maybe see her try to better herself.
Nope. Not even an ounce of effort on that front.
In fact, there's just this general feel all around that so much of what could have been built to change Reva got dropped quickly. Right down to playing up any PTSD she had with the prior incident at Dalby's the year prior. Not to mention the last time she intentionally messed a relationship up to get with a boy she didn't even really want, it led to that boy being killed. Nope. None of that matters. It's back to mocking people's weight and still acting like a bratty rich kid. Also, what happened to Robb or Hank? After how deep the relationship between Pam and "Foxy" was in the last book, to have her move on to Victor seems kind of lame. You'd also think Mickey or Clay would play a role, but they're never brought up, giving us yet another superfluous Clay. Even things in the book like Pres' stutter just seems to go away as Stine's more interested in Danny's never-ending headache.
And that at its core is the biggest problem here. This book has no real reason to exist. As a sequel, it's just not a good one. We get no character development for Reva, add new villains with their own stakes and no connection to the past incident. Almost as if parts of this draft was for something else but Stine chose to shoehorn Reva and the Silent Night book into it. And what you're left with is a bland kidnapping plot with criminals that make the Wet Bandits look like the world's greatest criminal minds. All while our main protagonist remains horrible to everyone around her and the book seems to focus on putting the fault strictly on Pam instead of, again, Reva being horrible to her yet again.
I will say that I'm glad I read The Rich Girl before tackling this and giving myself buffers to keep from going directly to the third book, so that I can at least be able to find a book that is far better structured and doesn't just lead to frustration or a horrible person still winning out in the end. So, it's a more interesting contrast when I consider that I finished reading my current favorite Fear Street and going to one that is without question the worst I've read so far. Stine's sequel issues manifest themselves once more. Oh, how in the hell am I going to cover #3 without finally going off the deep end? The cosmic ballet must go on. Silent Night 2 gets an F.
It Was Acceptable in the 90s: People Magazine, Portable Cassette Players, Doc Martens (or Dr. Martens here), Plymouth, CD Players, The Wall Street Journal Magazine, Sassy, CD World, Caller ID not fully realized, Those Really Neat Stuffed Ninja Turtles
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.